Forum Archive Index - June 2003

["tennyson@caverock.net.nz" <tennyson@caverock.net.nz>]

Craig Norgate, New Zealand's highest paid man today received notice 
that his contract as CEO of New Zealand's largest company, Fronterra, 
was not being renewed.   Since this bit if news has been made public, 
Norgate has declined all interviews, until this 'sharechat' exclusive!

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Snoopy:   Craig, commiserations on the loss of the job.   I guess being 
the sort of positive hard working fellow you are, you will be looking to 
the future?    Will that future be in New Zealand do you think?

Norgate:   My family is here, my wife is here, my life is here, my career 
is .... well my heart is still right here in Taranaki.  I'd like to stay.

Snoopy:   Any short term plans?

Norgate:  Well, I have to admit I got a bit out of shape in the hot seat at 
Fronterra, so my short term goal is to get my physical fitness back.   I'm 
starting a tourist taxi service back in New Plymouth.  But with a 
difference.   I'll be doing it with a rickshaw!

Snoopy:  That's one novel way to get around the suspension of your 
driving licence I suppose!

Norgate:  Yes, it should help shed a few kilos too.    I intend to use the 
time to build up my overseas experience, which 'certain people' think I 
lack.    My target market will be the overseas sailors from all visiting  oil 
tankers.  I'll be pulling them back and forth between boat and brothel.   
I've even got a name for the venture.  Norgates B&B service!  Take 
that  Henry van der Heyden! (the Chairman of the Fronterra board that 
ousted Norgate).

Snoopy:   Overseas sailors are a limited market.   You don't think you 
can entice those locals to jump in your trick trailer?

Norgate:   Well, to tell you the truth, I had a group of farmers approach 
me.   They wanted my rickshaw for an A&P gala show day.   And they 
all wanted to take turns.   But I turned them down.

Snoopy:  You didn't fancy leading your former farmer shareholders up 
and down the garden path?  

Norgate:  No, no problem there.   I've had lots of experience at that 
sort of thing.  It was the idea of the leather whip that I didn't like!

Snoopy:   Still in fairness, this hardly sounds like a solid step in the 
career path for NZ's fastest rising executive star?

Norgate:   No, and neither is it a solid step for me! (winks).   I have 
longer term plans to get back into the corporate battleground right here 
in this province.

Snoopy:  C'mon Craig be fair.   How many other two million dollar a 
year jobs do you think there are in New Zealand let alone the 
Wellington province?   You must have considered that by staying here 
you are bound to take a serious pay cut?

Norgate:  I know I have to be realistic.   I've be willing to seriously 
consider *any* job where I can earn $1,950,000 or more.   And what do 
you know, I've lined up a vacancy!

Snoopy:   Care to let us in on the secret?

Norgate:  Well, the only person in the Wellington province who earns 
more than me is Jonah Lomu.   Now we all know he has been having a 
few health problems, so guess who will be putting on the Hurricanes 
jersey next season?

Snoopy:   The same man that is wearing a dress as he sits in front of 
me now?

Norgate: (blushes) Well, I do admit Jonah's jersey is a little on the 
large side for me, but with a tuck here and a tuck there...  I feel I'm very 
lucky to have been laid off young enough to start this new career.   I'm 
really looking forward to cracking the corporate culture of the 
Hurricanes.  It will be a brawl!

Snoopy:   You don't think you are a little old to be commencing a 
professional football career at 38?

Norgate:  Well, Colin Meads was playing when he was older than that!

Snoopy:   What about form Craig?    I know you have always been a 
rugby fan.   But is failing to make the Hawera Haybailers fifteen in 
1976 really the sort of CV from which great rugby careers are made?

Norgate: Form didn't stop the last incumbant in my Hurricane's jersey 
(winks)!   Besides I am sure my chances of selection will improve when 
I finish pushing through my offer to buy out the whole Hurricanes 
franchise.  

Snoopy:    Glad we've had this chance to catch up.    All the best for 
the future Craig.

Norgate: Thanks Snoopy.

Interview Ends


   --
Message sent by Snoopy 
on Pegasus Mail version 4.02
----------------------------------
"Dogs have big tongues, so you can bet they don't 
bite them by accident"


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